Since I had a couple of days off and husband is on vacation, we went out to take some time out of the city. Originally, I wanted to go out to his family’s country house, but unfortunately, his family had booked the whole week and there wasn’t any room. I ended up booking a hotel room for the “weekend” just a little further down from where his family’s country house is.
Usually, I don’t book things like this, but my body was screaming for some alone time. I’m writing this short little blog before we head out back to Montreal. I had planned on just sitting alone and either doing some creative writing, or work on some videos I had taken in the last couple of weeks. With the writing, I’ve been struggling a bit with writer’s block. My new characters are stuck right now on a street corner and I can’t get them to move from that spot. I debated last night to start something new or just make myself do something that may not fit, but it would get them over that hurdle. Right before falling asleep, I found their way around. Before we head back home, I’m going to attempt to put that down so I can continue sending them home. (haha!)
As far as the videos… I have no idea what I’m doing on that. I just keep taking videos of whatever i’m doing or what seems cool. I need to get over myself and go through what I’ve captured and finish it. I hate the sound of my voice and the way I look, so I’m using this as a way to break through that awkardness and work on feeling more comfortable with my outward appearance.
I’ve settled and accepted the fact that I like to write romance. It’s a tough pill to swallow, but after finishing reading a romance novel that I had purchased last weekend, I realized that what I’m writing isn’t that different from what I read. I now know that it’s not the smutty stuff and romance novels aren’t the devil. I was under the assumption that all romance novels were like the hariliquin ones… boy was wrong. The book I just read doesn’t even have a sex scene in it. That makes me feel a lot better about what I write. I’m going to continue reading these types of books as it gives me the confidence that I’m okay.
This weekend has been relaxing and a bit stress-free. Husband and I got into an argument, but we needed that chance to actually communicate some things that have been really bothering us. There was a statement that I had made a while ago to him and I didn’t, at that time, explain it well enough for him. Yesterday, I was able to share those thoughts and feelings to him which made him understand a lot better. There’s still a lot to go for us, but maybe this will kick start some changes for our relationship.
The fight yesterday kinda stifled my creative juices, but on the other end of the spectrum, the mountain air has cleared some stress from my chest. My tendonitis is barely noticeable as well. I didn’t get exactly what I had wanted to do, but the things that had happened this weekend was worth it.
Now, I’m going to spend my last couple of hours working on my characters, and maybe I can take them home and explore more at my house to help them tell their story.